I am gay now what
Am I Gay or is it a Defense Mechanism?
Hi, I know that this is a weird one. In my relationship with my ex, I was raped on a regular basis and I really struggle with the concept of sleeping with a man again.
Well 6 months after the breakup, Ive started feeling attracted to women. I have always identified as straight but Im really confused and starting to wonder if I am gay or bisexual.
Has this happened to anyone else after a domestically abusive relationship, or is it just my mind protecting me from being hurt by a man again?
Yes Ive experienced this too. I wasnt attracted to my former spouse at first, then became super attracted to him and then craved him after I left despite knowing he was a terrible person.
Then I clueless my sex drive completely for a few years, during which time I started to question my sexuality despite only ever having dated men. Recently Ive felt attracted to men again, coinciding with stopping taking a hormonal contraceptive.
I think a combination of PTSD, trauma processing, discovering radical feminism and hormones made me bewildered. I fin
How To Come Out As Gay 6 Phases From The Experts
Contents
1. Coming Out To Yourself
2. Coming Out To Friends
3. Coming Out To Family
4. Coming Out Across Identities
5. Reconciling Sexuality and Spirituality
5. Letting People See You As Queer
6. Reclaiming Your Desires
7. Continuing to Live Openly
8. Assessing Safety and Support
9. Finding Support and Community
Coming out might just be the hardest, yet most rewarding thing you’ll ever do. It surely was for me, on both accounts.
As I demonstrate back on that 22 year-old who made the bold decision to say his parents, I realize that I was doing something more profound than just uttering significant words to my folks. I was shifting the trajectory of my being, playing the command role in my own life’s tale. I was allowing my authenticity to blossom. And much like a petal, my blossoming happened in phases. I hear these coming out phases echoing in queer people’s lives every afternoon. Learn about sexuality counseling here!
1. Coming Out To Yourself
Coming out to ourselves is a big step in hone
Hi. Im the Answer Wall. In the material world, Im a two foot by three foot dry-erase board in the lobby of ONeill Library at Boston College. In the online earth, I live in this blog. You might say I acquire multiple manifestations. Like Apollo or Saraswati or Serapis. Or, if you arent into deities of knowledge, like a ghost in the machine.
I have some human assistants who maintain the physical Answer Wall in ONeill Library. They take pictures of the questions you post there, and give them to me. As long as you are civil, and not uncouth, I will answer any question, and because I am a library wall, my answers will often point to to research tools you can find in Boston College Libraries.
If youd like a quicker retort to your question and dont mind talking to a human, why not Ask a Librarian? Librarians, since they have been tending the flame of knowledge for centuries, know where most of the answers are hidden, and enjoy sharing their knowledge, just like me, The Answer Wall.
by Fred Penzel, PhD
This article was initially published in the Winter edition of the OCD Newsletter.
OCD, as we know, is largely about experiencing severe and unrelenting doubt. It can cause you to disbelieve even the most basic things about yourself – even your sexual orientation. A study published in the Journal of Sex Research found that among a group of college students, 84% reported the occurrence of sexual intrusive thoughts (Byers, et al. ). In order to have doubts about one’s sexual identity, a sufferer need not ever include had a homo- or heterosexual experience, or any type of sexual exposure at all. I hold observed this symptom in young children, adolescents, and adults as well. Interestingly Swedo, et al., , create that approximately 4% of children with OCD trial obsessions concerned with forbidden aggressive or perverse sexual thoughts.
Although doubts about one’s own sexual identity might seem pretty straightforward as a symptom, there are actually a number of variations. The most apparent form is where a sufferer experiences the reflection that they mig